Managing emotion

Managing emotional reactions means choosing how and when to express the emotions we feel.  It's healthy to express their feelings — but that it matters how (and when) they express them.  Reacting to situations in productive ways means choosing the way to react instead of letting emotions influence what to do or say things regretted later.

The skills we use to manage our emotions and react well are part of a bigger group of emotional skills called emotional intelligence (EQ). Developing all the skills that make up emotional intelligence takes time and practice.  These are skills anyone can practice (a) emotional awareness : being able to notice and identify the emotions we feel at any given moment and (b) understanding and accepting emotions:  knowing why we feel the way we do.

It's OK to feel whatever way we feel without blaming others or judging ourselves for how we feel.  Acknowledge your feelings without letting them run away with you. We always have a choice about how to react to situations. Once we realize that, it's easier to make choices that work out well. Learning to react well takes practice. But we all can get better at taking emotional situations in stride and expressing emotions in healthy ways. And that's something to feel good about!

There are a number of actions that you can take that will help you to manage your emotions. Many of them are very general: exercise, be open and accept what is going on around you, distract yourself, don’t give in to negative thinking, spend time outside, be grateful, doing things that you enjoy and good for you, and notice the good things in your life. Basically things that help reduce the stress levels.

Reason is infinitely more powerful than emotion if we make proper and conscious use of it. It allows us to regulate the emotional response. It leads us to balance the conflict. It gives us the ability to feel our emotions properly and modulate them in response to a stressful stimulus. 

We can change how we feel. The key is to be aware of our emotional response, and understand what might be behind it. That way, we can apply some reason to the situation. For example, you might ask yourself some questions about possible courses of action, like:
How do I feel about this situation?

What do I think I should do about it?
What effect would that have for me and for other people?
Does this action fit with my values?
If not, what else could I do that might fit better?
Is there anyone else that I could ask about this who might help me?
This helps you to apply reason to an emotional response before reacting.